i'm not an expert. here's my advice anyway.

I'm no expert on love or heartbreak, let alone knowledgeable enough to advise anyone else to deal with either one. If you'd told me I'd still be struggling with the things I've struggled with over the past 5 or 6 months, I'd tell you that you were crazy. I'd tell you I was stronger, more resilient. I'd tell you I'm a bada** and everything would work out perfectly in the end. And that might have been true when I was 16 or even 20, but I'm not-so-sure that's me anymore. I'm still the girl who holds it together, when that's the last thing I want to do. But not nearly enough, or as often. I miss that girl, really I do.

But I'm starting to recognize myself, again. I have learned to not wonder what the future will hold. The dots will connect years later from now. Not wondering about the future reminds me of this must-read blog post. My clock's ticking for engagement rings and wedding bells, but that's not my story right now! Life changes every single day. It's never, ever consistent! Often, I remind myself that feeling lonely, happy, sad and excited only means one thing... I'm alive! And, also, I'm normal. Where I am right now is okay, too!

I wanted to share some of the things I'm learning:
 
1. Don't give up on love. Don't give up on future relationships. Don't give up on what you want. Don't give up on your standards of what you deserve. Don't give up on yourself when heartbreak hurts - time does NOT make it go away - but it makes it easier. Don't give up on the relationship and marriage you've always wanted. I'm only 22. There's no reason for me to turn into the "Dog Lady" or join Match.com just yet! I'm giving myself til 28 before I become desperate ;) My story is still being written. Yours is too.

2. For me, the hardest part are the moments I would've (or he would've) been there, but wasn't. The weddings you would've attended together. The graduation, in which he should have sat beside my parents. Big news. Summer plans. Anniversaries. Birthdays. It's okay to want them there. It's okay to miss them. But DON'T just call to talk! Have a reason! Don't call because you miss them, because you WILL miss them! Discerning these things are important for you to move on! It's the difference between doing what's been comfortable for so long and making the choice to have that person be a part of your story. Doing this may have been the one thing I've done right the past five months.

3. Deal with the break-up right away. Don't stuff it in until you explode one day. Trust me, I've been there, done that and got the t-shirt. On August 7th, I broke down. I yelled, screamed, cried and threw a temper tantrum. I realized for the very first time that my heart was really broken and grieving from breaking up with someone who'd been a huge part of my life. All of which, I hadn't done from the end of May until the beginning of August. No tears, no acceptance of what had happened. So, admit that it hurts. Admit that you're sad, confused and heartbroken. Because until you're honest, you can't start healing. And there's so much contentment in healing. The tears? I'm stronger from saying, "I'm broken, I'm hurt. Hey God... Hey friends.... Hey mama... help me heal, please!" through tears streaming down my face, than I ever was with pint up emotions!

4. Clearly communicate with the other person. What you want, and what you don't want - take the time to tell them! It may be difficult, but anything worth doing will never be easy. You may be okay with leaving them hanging, but if you love them... or if you admit that you once loved them... they're worth being told where they stand with you. They're worth a conversation to clear the air. I am worth that much, even though I ended the relationship!!! You should know that you are, too.

5. You're break up isn't the end of the world. It's just not! It hurts, it's awful and it takes time to overcome. But life's still life. It's still good, so good. THERE ARE MORE FISH IN THE SEA - ALWAYS. Try your best not to loose your cool when you see pictures of him with girls on Facebook. If it's something? You'll live! If it's not? You didn't waste your time stressing out about it, too much, anyway ;) Keep living life!! Spend time investing in your friends, your work, your wardrobe and yourself. Spend time with guy friends. It's a great way to determine what's important to you when you start dating again. It takes work to actively move forward. Just know that everything will be alright and you'll be just fine.

LET GO, baby girl! Let it go :)

This may be useless and the worst advice ever, but take it for what it's worth. I'm certainly no expert! And I'm still learning many of these things. Just know your story is still being written! Honestly, that gets me through most days. My life may not seem all that exciting, but it's still a pretty good life!! Even after college ;) My friends? They're the best!! Let go of what you've got planned. If that boy wants you in his life, you'll be there - somehow, someway!! And if you're not, it's for a reason. And a really good one at that, too!!