Today and 365 Days Ago

I was riding down the road drinking a Coke today becauseI had a headache, and it was HOT and HUMID, AGAIN! I thought to myself, “Some pound cake would be really good with this coke, right now!!’ Something clicked. I quickly and without thinking, picked up the phone and looked at the date. Today is June 18, 2009.

Three hundred and sixty-five days ago, I didn’t want a Coke or a piece of Pound Cake!! ALL I wanted was another day… that is, with my Grandmother. It’s hard to believe that a year has flown by. It’s hard to think about today– one year ago. The pain NEVER goes away. It just subsides, until, the little things remind you of what you’re missing with the ones you love who are in Heaven. Then, your experiences tell you it’s okay, because she’s better there than here. At least that’s what people say, anyway.

Tears welled up in my eyes, and I began to cry. I couldn’t stop. I picked up the phone to call the only person that I knew would understand.. my Mama. She didn’t answer. Maybe she won’t notice today, until it passes her by. Today (for the rest of it anyway) I’m going to think of my Grandmother, happily. No more tears. I don’t want to mull over the goodbyes. I don’t need that, or want that, or believe that those tears will bring me any more comfort. I sure could use some Pound Cake though! She did make the best! I have more GOOD memories with her and pound cake and Coke… than all the BAD memories of the few days we had left :)