Try.

I'm going to wake up at 5:10a.m. and get myself out of bed and go for a walk... or a run if I can even function to run at that time of morning. And then I'm going to come home, eat a small breakfast, pack my gym bag, pack my lunch and get ready for the day. I'm going to leave (relatively) on time for work. I'm going to mark things off my office and personal to do list. Water, juice and milk will be all I drink. I refuse to spend TOO much time checking to see if my favorite bloggers have added another post - because I've got things to accomplish! And I refuse to go out to eat something that's not healthy. I completely refuse to eat large portions of food. Until I see progress. On the way home from work, I'm going to stop by the gym and work hard. Really hard. Then, I'll come home and eat another healthy meal.... EARLY.  And I'll make myself get some rest. Anddddd let me tell you I'll probably mess up on some of this. Not even do other parts. You know, I'm not really used to this whole routine thing. This grown-up life stuff.
But I'm sure going to give it all a try! I don't know how I'm going to have the energy.... let alone making this a routine, but I'm going to do this. I'm going to start working harder and harder at everything I do. Exhausting, I know.  I get it. But it's worth giving it a try. It's worth a try! I make mistakes. I take the wrong path. I say the wrong things. I act before I think. I speak before I think. I cannot make a life decision if my world depended on it. I cry. And I laugh. I expect far too much and way too little. I yearn for things I shouldn't and turn away from things I should. I don't believe in myself hardly enough. I have meltdowns. I'm stressed. I eat too much. I give in too easily. I fight so hard for other things. Everyday I wish for my own place - and I wonder if it'd even fix a part of my struggles. I wish my mother would let my do my own flippin' laundry. I long to "begin a life of my own" and I don't even KNOW what that means to me!!!! I'm completely and totally overwhelmed by this crossroad in my life that I just want to run away. I sound like a broken record. Let's get real, I am a broken record. Ha! I'm just going to give myself another try.