God's plan.

I wrote this last night, but never published it. I was exhausted last night. You'll see why...

I'll spare you the ins-and-outs of my drama-filled day. I'm emotionally and physically tired. Long story short, I decided TODAY was THE DAY to "fish or cut bait" with my internship. My boss hadn't given me any indication if should commit or start exploring other options, and I didn't want to overstay my welcome. So, after MUCH encouragement from my parents and closest friends, I decided to finallyyyyy take matters into my very own hands.

Technically, I took the position as a summer intern. And well, summer's over, dude...

Anyway, I was terrified to confront the situation. My boss could've told me that I'm an awful, no good PR intern. And I would've cried. Awkwardly. It was my very worst fear! Or he could've hire me right there on the spot. And I was scared of that, too.  It was all too much!

At some point this afternoon, I decided that whatever happened God was in complete and total control over the whole situation! What was meant to be, would be. Fish or cut bait.
I set up the meeting via email, walked into his office and just started talking....

So what's the outcome?
God pretty much told me to wait.
Via the Chief Marketing Officer.

It was pretty much the BEST possible outcome! We're both waiting to see what's best for both me and the company in the long run. In the short-term, my internship doesn't have an expiration date. I'm just THE INTERN.

Neither of us are in a real hurry to make any decisions. He told me I jumped right into my responsibilities and I'm a self-starter. He told me my co-workers helped and encouraged me because... well... I was worth helping and encouraging. He told me I'd never stop making mistakes. He told me I fit in with the company.

God's teaching me so much right now.
I've learned to really listen to God when He tugs on my heart steadily.  And if not, I've learned that He will lead me down the right path whenever I trust Him.

Lif'e's hard. Tornadoes abruptly end your collegiate career. You search months and months for a job, without success. You struggle with a season of depression. You break up with the guy you thought you'd marry. You move home after college. And then - after all that - you've got to walk into an office and initiate a "fish or cut bait" conversation. 

Just today, I started being THANKFUL for every single one of those
struggles - for what God's teaching me through them! Sometimes the difficult 
things in life are worth the struggles. Because it's then, God begins doing work in us. It's then, we learn the devestation and the beauty of heartbreak. It's then, we are able to write new chapters in our lives. 

It's then, we learn to trust in God's plan, rather than our own. 

Just wait.